PORK RIND APPRECIATION DAY UPDATES
Bet Most of You Don’t Have THAT On Your Super Bowl Snack Table, Do Ya!?
-“Well, we can’t trust our government anymore.” We all know that statement has been a driving mantra for conservatives going as far back as Ronald Reagan. It is kind of the thing they have used to seize power and get even crazier and crazier – and this morning was a perfect encapsulation of the crazy. The quote above was made by Kristi Noem, the puppy-murdering ex-Governor of one of the Dakotas – and who is the current Secretary of Homeland Security. And the statement was made by Noem this morning. On CNN. And Dana Bash did not need to sweat by staring at Noem and responding, “But you ARE the government.” Which Noem did not deny.
-Folks who read this Substack are more than aware of the full-press attacks on all sorts of Government institutions, and some of those attacks will be discussed and mocked here. But, personally speaking, there are still moments that startle and then roll our eyes at, at the apparent lack of awareness of the other side that can and should be infuriating on one hand, yet should also tick us off at the stupidity and brazenness of it all.
-With that, on to other updates …
-On the attacks to the institutions, one of the bigger firestorms of the last couple of days are coming from medical facilities, research institutions, and universities that work to cure cancer and other physical maladies – and how monies that have previously been approved are now being withheld from payment by Elon Musk and his barely-pubescent coding gang. Alarms from doctors and patients are being sounded as loudly as possible, as no explanations for the cuts have been coming – save for federal agencies being shut down and photos of researchers of color being taken down in the halls of the National Institutes of Health amid demands that any references to diversity, equity and inclusion and transgender terminology be stricken from records or future funding proposals.
-Musk’s teams continue to roam through as many government agencies as they can, accompanied by private security guards that have prevented members of Congress from entering those same offices (that happened with the Departments of Treasury and Education) – and Musk uploaded a photo of him sleeping in the halls of one of the offices – in a stars and stripes sleeping bag, because nothing says I LOVE AMERICA than a Nazi-sympathizing apartheid baby literally wrapping himself in a flag while incels plant malware and ransomware throughout the government (ALLEGEDLY) (SATIRE) (I hope) – in an apparent attempt to show how hard he and his teen- and twenty-something coding outfit are working to “find waste” in every government agency EXCEPT, oddly enough, the Department of Defense.
-Huh.
-As for Elon’s underling, Donald Trump is working to act on some of the most burning issues this country faces. Why, earlier in the weekend Trump pulled out his Sharpie and made it clear that the Worst President Who Ever Presidented, Joe Biden, would no longer receive a security clearance. And that’s important, because … (looking it up) … Biden never had such clearance because former Presidents don’t. So Trump made extra-sure Biden wouldn’t get something he wasn’t going to get – and you said he didn’t work!
-Emboldened, Trump went to another super-important issue of our time, and with a second stroke of the Sharpie, hereby decreed that … (checks notes) … paper straws will no longer sully the lips of Americans in America! Yes, citizens, if you need to slurp your Diet Coke with a cylindrical object because your motor skills are eroding, you will now need to do with good old American plastic (and the micro-plastics that will get into your system will be American, too)!
-Feeling patriotic yet? Good! Because in his last act of Making America Great Again, Trump apparently heard of a drag performance somewhere in or on the grounds of the Kennedy Center, and decided That Will Not Do! So, in a social media post on Friday, Dear Leader announced that he would not just be the Leader of Us (as in U.S.), but he will become the personal leader of the Kennedy Center of the Arts!
-While it is fairly clear that the only people who actually can make such a change are board members, the President has some sway over who can be on that Board, and since he apparently is happy with Elon’s job doing whatever Elon is doing, we can potentially look forward to a Federally-funded premiere of SPRINGTIME FOR HITLER by Kanye West starring Scott Baio and Lara Trump in 2026 – just in time for new works celebrating the Constitution that are funded by the National Endowment for the Arts, which announced all (or most?) funding from them from now on will need to be about that.
-I’m kind of venting right now, and normally with this being Super Bowl Sunday, I would be looking forward to a few hours away from the politics and all the madness that has made me vent. Unfortunately, not even Super Bowl Sunday is going to be spared for us from these nimrods. So … MORE VENTING …
-Trump has decided he wants to see the big game in person, so in addition to the obligatory pre-game Fox interview (as they have the broadcast this year), Trump will stay to watch the game in person in New Orleans (which, sadly, will be a first in Super Bowl history, argh!). Expect any booing to be edited out, just as the NFL will make Trump more comfortable by omitting the END RACISM slogan that has been printed on the field all season in every other game played.
-And Elon? Reports are that he is going to spend over $40 million on ads (at $8 million per 30 seconds) running bits of propaganda and (more than likely) outright falsehoods about “savings” his minions have “discovered” amidst their rewriting of computer programs in the offices he has infiltrated – with potential particular emphasis on the USAID program that has been singled out as an example of what he wants to and is doing – and in a possible attempt to rebuild what are atrocious polling numbers and an unprecedented fury of phone messages being left to Congressional offices up and down the ideological spectrum, with Musk the central target of the concern and fury.
-That singling out of Musk is also echoed in this week’s TIME magazine cover, in which Musk is seen sitting behind the vaunted Resolute Desk. That the magazine would go so far as to openly flout Musk usurping Trump would in previous years, likely already have resulted in Musk getting fired by Trump – and as reported here several times, reports persist that the inner Trump circle is increasingly angered at the power and ego Musk expresses.
-There IS good news on various fights against Trump and Elon, however. Musk acknowledged the court order early Saturday morning that demanded he stop work on the systems of the Treasury, having a nasty exchange with Rep. Dan Goldman of NY about it – and openly contemplated whether he might try to defy the order. The committee vote on the nomination of Ka$h Patel to head the FBI was put off – a potential sign of problems, or at least a need of caution, with the vote.
-And there is apparent growing frustration over the lack of deportations in these early weeks of the regime, despite the promise of thousands of illegal immigrants being forced to leave the country and, more importantly to Trump, the lack of visuals of people of color being arrested by ICE agents on a live stream. Besides the big-talk of Deportation Czar Tom Homan not being backed up by action, the problem seems to be the simple fact that there really isn’t as big an illegal immigrant problem as Trump claimed there was. Shocked not shocked, but opposition and resistance are growing as Musk gets more emboldened (since nobody on his side even seems to know what he is doing, much less wanting to stop him) and Trump gets more detached from reality than normal.
-Oh, and remember the Musk TIME cover story? Trump was directly asked whether it bothered him that Musk got that cover on Friday, and Trump responded with a weak “no,” then had it followed with a deep sigh, nod of the head, and dip of the chin in sadness. So you know it TOTALLY burned him and continues to, so …watch that space? Perhaps …
-So keep the faith, keep the sound on mute for the Super Bowl to avoid any potential Musk ads (or the Michael Bay-produced recruitment ad for the Secret Service) and turn off for the other ads which seem to feature lots of celebrity duos (Catherine O’Hara and Willem Dafoe playing pickleball for Michelob Ultra, Cher and Charli XCX waiting for food from Uber Eats, Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan back at the deli for Hellman’s mayo), enjoy the Kendrick Lamar halftime show (which supposedly has a major guest surprise coming – OOH!) and, of course, the game itself (I am not a betting man but, despite people being fed up with Travis and Taylor and the X factor or Saquon Barkley, the fact is only one QB has managed to beat Patrick Mahomes in the last four years, and that’s Joe Burrow, who plays for Cincinnati and not Philadelphia – so I’m not going against Kansas City until Mahome-y blows it or some takes it away).
-And, on a personal note, thanks to everyone for helping this Substack build readership! I appreciate you all doing that and hope I can merit you to continue to do it! (And hey, if you haven’t left a tip in the form of a paid subscription and you can, I would appreciate that too!)
-TO THE TRIVIA!
-NEWS ON THIS DATE: In 1825, John Quincy Adams won the Presidency in the U.S. House of Representatives despite losing the popular vote in what became known as “the corrupt bargain.” In 1943, the Battle of Guadalcanal ended with an Allied victory. In 1950, Joseph McCarthy claimed Communists had infiltrated the State Department. In 1984, Yuri Andropov became the shortest-lived Soviet Union Premier by dying (he was replaced by Konstantin Chernenko). In 1992, Magic Johnson ended his retirement (due to an AIDS diagnosis) to play in that year’s NBA All-Star Game. In 1995, Bernard Harris became the first Black man to walk in space.
-DEBUTS ON THIS DATE: Horse racing (1540), FALSTAFF (1893), Daylight Savings Time (1942), The Beatles on American television (1964), RIVERDANCE (1995).
-HAPPY BIRTHDAY: William Henry Harrison, Dean Rusk, Bill Veeck, Ernest Tubb, Brendan Behan, Vic Wertz, Roger Mudd, Clete Boyer, Carole King, Joe Pesci, Joseph Stiglitz, Alice Walker, Mia Farrow, Joe Ely, Judith Light, Mookie Wilson, Jim J. Bullock, John Kruk, Travis Tritt, Jim Miller, Charlie Day, Vladimir Guerrero, Zhang Ziyi, Tom Hiddleston, Michael B. Jordan, and Rose Leslie.
-REST IN PEACE/POWER: Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Paul Laurence Dunbar, Sophie Tucker, Gabby Hayes, Max Yasgur, Percy Faith, Bill Haley, Bud Wilkinson, J. William Fulbright, Hank Bauer, Ed Sabol, John Gavin, Chick Corea, and Jeremy Giambi.
-THIS WEEKEND IN CULTURE: The Number One Nonfiction Book in America on this date … in 2025, THE SIREN’S CALL by Chris Hayes … in 2015, AMERICAN SNIPER by Chris Kyle with Scott McEwen and Jim DeFelice … in 2005, BLINK by Malcolm Gladwell … in 1995, THE HOT ZONE by Richard Preston … in 1985, IACOCCA: AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY by Lee Iacocca with William Novak … and in 1975, THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE by Charles Berlitz.
-MUSIC OF THE DAY: Making their recording debut on this date in 2004, Franz Ferdinand!